Wednesday, 24 August 2016



DICK – Tom, Tom, I’m really excited!

TOM – Are we doing an investigation again? We could investigate bow ties, or, or, adding things. I like adding things yet I’ve no idea who invented it.

DICK – Shepherds I think, mmm, I wonder if sheep count shepherds to get them off to sleep? No matter ‘cos we ain’t investigating.

TOM – I don’t understand then. What then is making you so excited?

DICK – Well me being a poemy genius and everything, and what with us not having to do stuff for them pesky Clueless Collective poets, I’ve finished me latest poem that I’ve been working on for three years. Prepare to be astounded:

Here I sit broken hearted
Spent twenty p
But only farted.

Brilliant eh? I’ll tell yer, I’m gonna win awards with that.


TOM – It’s shit. I’ve heard it before.

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